


The Hulk Collection

by BruceBanner_CantHave_NiceThings



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bad BDSM Etiquette, F/M, Fluff, Hulk and Steve friendship, Hulk and natasha friendship, Humor, Introspection, M/M, Mentions of Mutants, Romance, Smut, Steve can't catch a break, Team Angst, The avengers are too mistrustful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-07
Updated: 2015-07-17
Packaged: 2018-01-18 11:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 18,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1426954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BruceBanner_CantHave_NiceThings/pseuds/BruceBanner_CantHave_NiceThings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of short stories involving the Hulk. Some of these are prompts from followers on tumblr and some I came up with. The story taken from tumblr prompts will be marked as such.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Enjoy the Silence

**Author's Note:**

> 51 pegasi-b requested: The kind of movie Hulk loves (that no one suspected).

Hulk’s team loved movies.

Tony was a big fan of either the ones with the explosions or really hard ones to understand where the writers made Hulk just feel really dumb.

Clint and Thor, well they liked explosions too or the really funny stuff. Thor liked the kind of funny where people fell down a lot (which was Hulk’s kinda thing too) Clint liked the kind of funny where people play with words and such (which Hulk didn’t like at all)

Natasha didn’t really say what she liked, but she had a little smile on her face whenever watching any movie involving dancing.

Hulk….Hulk loved being with his team, no matter what they watched. 

Though he did have some movies he watched when no one else was around.

It wasn’t anything sexy (mostly because those movies didn’t really make Hulk feel anything, except embarrassed and uncomfortable)

Hulk loved movies where no one talked.

There was music and the people in the movie moved their mouths and did things with their bodies, but there were no pesky words to get in the way.

Most of the time Hulk could guess the dialogue just by what was going on with their bodies.

Bodies talked to Hulk easier than words, which could lie or confuse you.

But, most of the time, bodies were honest. You just moved how you moved, regardless of what you were saying. 

You could talk about being happy, but have your hands curled up into fists at your side.

Or say that you weren’t scared, but have your hands across your chest, protecting yourself.

But bodies were honest. Bodies told the truth even when you didn’t want them to.

And bodies could be just as action filled without words. Buster Keaton could get into a chase with bad guys just as well without you ever hearing his voice.

And Charlie Chaplin could be just as funny, could dance just as well, without a sound.

Hulk went into those quiet worlds without needing someone to explain what was going on, to translate the ideas or witty phrases.

The bodies, the actors, spoke to him without a word.

Complete, beautiful honesty. 


	2. Birth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hulksmashingpumpkins requested: Hulk revisiting his birthplace

All he really remembers about this place is pain and heat and shouting

Then screaming, crying and hitting.

Though he cant remember who did all that, except for him. Sometimes all three at once.

He didn’t know why he cried or even what tears were but the little feeling in his chest that he came to call Banner knew that his world had changed.

Hulk just knew that he was being hit over and over again by this really big noisy tube things.

He finds his birthplace without a struggle because whenever he gets close he thinks he can hear the screams.

The soldiers crying because there’s a monster out there trying to kill them.

There’s a creature that means everything they’ve ever thought about the world is wrong.

There’s Betty, wondering if this means that Bruce is dead, that only the thing remains.

The thing a soldier would name Hulk. a short time later.

He tears down the no trespassing signs and moves almost silently through the abandoned buildings. 

It’s familiar and strange all at the same time.

Banner remembers these tables, those screens, this floor.

He remembers kissing Betty in the kitchen, holding her hand as he displayed his research, receiving a proud kiss on his cheek.

But this was never Hulk’s place, not really.

It was outside, in the hot red dirt that Hulk was born. So he returns there, leaving the ghosts of Banner’s former life behind.

He lets the dirt run through his fingers. He feels like he should feel something more here.

He was born here. Life began here, but it isn’t home.

It is where he began and yet where he learned that being what he was, even before he knew what that was, is a bad thing.

He knew this dirt before he knew his name, before he ever decided that being a Hulk was being strong, was saving people.

Before he ever decided that though the soldier called him Hulk and monster in the same breath, that he could choose to be only one of those things.

That he could choose what being Hulk meant.

But this desert is nothing but sadness, for him and Banner.

He takes small comfort in the fact that birth was also sad for Banner as well. That being a Bruce Banner was seen as something wrong and dangerous and sick by at least one person who brought him into the world.

Hulk huffs and begins to walk away. He decides to put all the yucky feelings of this place behind him.

Sure he was born in hate and fear.

His birth wasn’t celebrated but despised.

But that didn’t mean the rest of his life had to be that way.

Just like how he defined what being a Hulk meant,

he could decide what he’d do with the life he gained here.


	3. Sif always wins (even when she loses)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is something I wanted to write because I love the idea of someone appreciating Hulk's strength and love of a fight and I immediately thought "Sif".

You could say one thing for Asgardians, they definitely knew how to party.

The Avengers were scattered about, eating, drinking and singing their hearts out. There was enough food to feed multiple starving nations and booze to intoxicate multiple elephants on gold enameled tables. 

It was their reward, for helping Asgard in their unending war against the Frost Giants. 

Natasha took another sip of mead and looked across the room at the Hulk. He was sequestered in a corner, talking to the warrior known as Sif, one of Thor’s closest friends, so Natasha had heard.

And she was smiling and….Natasha’s eyes weren’t nearly that good but she could swear that Sif’s eyes were dilated.

"Your fighting in the battle today was truly spectacular, friend Hulk." Sif said, drinking her own drink.

"You liked it?" He asked, a little unsure.

"It was masterful. I could watch you fight all day. I can honestly say that few people in any realm could contend against you."

Natasha couldn’t help it. It was too bizarre.

"Is she serious?": She asked Thor, kicking him under the table.

"Who?" Thor asked, turning from the large Asgardian on his right, who was telling a joke that Thor found quite funny.

"Her" Natasha said, slyly pointing her drink at Sif.

He nodded. “Lady Sif is truly enamored with our green comrade. She has been raving about his fighting prowess all day.”

Natasha couldn’t quite process that. Sure she trusted Hulk more now but….to be enamored after watching him destroy everything in sight?

"But he’s…."

"A valiant warrior. And truly respectful of a lady comrade on the battlefield, something Sif has struggled to find in her years on Asgard."

Respectful, right. Until things went wrong. 

Clint chose that precise moment to stop his unending chat with one of Asgard’s most respected archers.

"You guys talking about beauty and the beast over there?" He asked, turning one of the priceless antique chairs backwards to sit on it.

"Yes. Does she know quite who she’s dealing with, do you think?"

Thor gave her a look of affront.

"Sif is not one to engage others haphazardly. If she is opening herself up to Hulk then she must see something she likes. I trust her judgement in this and you should as well"

Then Sif busted out in laughter and the entire table turned to look at her.

Thor’s face was full of confusion. “Sif is…rarely this boisterous in her joy. She must…be enjoying his company quite more than I expected”

"You think she wants to screw the Hulk?" Clint asked, putting his drink down, hard.

"I…" Thor mumbled. And then he shook his head. "Whatever Sif does in bed and who she does it with is none of my concern.

"I mean I love the guy, but I’ve never thought he could be that funny." Clint rambled on. "You only laugh at someone’s lame jokes like that if you wanna fuck ‘em"

"Or if you want to learn information from them, make them think you want to have sex with them, to get into their good graces." Natasha went on.

Sif put her hand on one of Hulk’s and patted it. He looked at his hand in shock and then up at her. She motioned to the table where the rest of the Avengers were gathered and he said something that made her laugh again.

As she walked away, Hulk didn’t even pretend he wasn’t watching her body.

Sif thumped her hand on the table and addressed the area where Thor, Clint and Natasha were.

"Hulk has just challenged me to an Arm Battle. For which I do not know the rules. Also I am quite parched"

Then she grabbed one of the apples on the table and took a big bite, waiting for the others to fill her in on the rules.

Clint did so, stumbling over his words.

And then, being the obnoxious person he is, said to Sif, “Did you know that Hulk was looking at your ass the entire way over?”

She swallowed a bit of apple and smiled. “But of course. He asked if he could.”

Clint shook his head. “Wait, what?”

She gave him a look that said she thought he was quite slow. “Our green friend asked for permission to watch the way my body moved as I walked away and I agreed. He did not want to leer you see. Quite respectable. And if you’ll excuse me, I have a battle to win!”

With that, she made her way back to “their green friend”.

Clint scratched his head. “Well um…”

"I heard there was gonna be a fight between Hulk and Sif? Can we sell tickets to this thing?"

Their heads all shot up.

Tony was in front of them.

"Not a battle, they’re just gonna arm wrestle" Clint said, still in shock.

"But still, could make a lot of money on this. I for one am not gonna miss the show. Also, I’m out of mead. Hey someone direct me to a drink!" With that 4 hands all shot out to his side, bearing drinks.

He took two and sat down. “Man I love this place. Also I was beside them for a bit and heard that not only are they gonna fight, but they’re betting on it.”

"Betting? Betting what?" Clint asked.

"Didn’t hear. Was too busy talking to a troll about engineering Asgardian weapons."

"Be quite man of iron, they fight is about to begin."

A hush drew over the crowd and Hulk and Sif assumed the position. When their hands gripped each other, it looked as if Hulk was going to spontaneously combust. Their muscles rippled as both struggled to pin the other one down.

Hulk looked at Sif in confusion and then admiration as she almost pinned his hand once…twice…three times.

He struggled to push back up and then she looked on starry eyed. Her eyes seemed to grow larger in her head as she watched his arm muscles move with exertion.

Then they locked eyes and neither one of them could stop looking into each others faces.

It was almost too intimiate to watch.

Almost. But it was too exciting to turn away from.

Sif had Hulk’s hand hovering from the table’s surface and Hulk, with one last burst of energy, flung her hand on the table and the room went up with a shout.

The crowd moved in to clap Hulk on the back and tease their warrior on her loss. She got up slowly and circled around to Hulk and slid into his lap. 

"I, Lady Sif, have lost to this valiant warrior of Midguard. And, as I am not one to make a bet and then break it, I will now reward him!" 

She put her drink down on the table behind her and then laid her lips, hard onto Hulk’s own.

"What?" Natasha spat out, some of her mead dribbling out onto her chin.

"What?" Clint echoed.

"Way to go Hulk!" Tony screamed, applauding.

Hulk placed a hand on her hair, egging her on and another on her back. He pressed her to his chest and tilted his head to return the kiss.

In the push and pull of it, they saw Sif deepen the kiss and Hulk let out with an inhuman moan. He pulled Sif away from him so they could both breathe.

She whispered something in his ear and he smiled. And then they kissed again, sweetly. She then got up and came back to the table.

"It seems that our battle has left us both thirsty" She said, getting a couple of drinks.

Natasha couldn’t help it, she grabbed onto the warrior’s arm and held her there.

"I have to ask this. I’m sorry. But, what was that all about?"

She shrugged. “Hulk said, if he won the arm wrestle, he would like a kiss from me and I agreed.”

"Because you assumed that you would win?" Natasha asked.

"I had no such assumption. Hulk is quite the warrior and also funny and polite, not to mention lusty without being disrespectful. I admire those qualities in a man. And in a lover." She said with a smile.

"And what did you wager?" Thor asked.

"Simply that if I won, he would owe me a kiss for every day and night of his stay on Asgard. And that is truly a great loss for," and here she turned to Natasha with a sparkle in her eye. "Hulk’s mouth and tongue are just as gifted as the rest of him.

And with that she walked off. 

Natasha sat down and took a good long swig of her drink. And then Tony’s. 

 


	4. Embarrassment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another idea strictly from me. I just loved the idea of contrasting Tony's inability to be embarrassed by almost anything and my idea of Hulk's high level of easy embarrassment, especially in a funny situation like this.

This was the first time the gang had seen Hulk looking embarrassed.

He sat in a corner on the floor, his head hanging down so he couldn't see the TV screen.

But the rest of them were enraptured.

"What I wanna know," Tony asked, enraged, "Is how they hacked my fucking system. Nobody fucking hacks me! I’ve been looking at this shit for days and can’t find their grubby little fuckin’ footprints anywhere."

"Hackers leave footprints?" Clint asked, popping a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

"They leave a signature, they have a style, but this isn’t anything I’ve seen before." Tony said and then turned on Natasha and Clint. "Shouldn't you guys be hunting down the bastard who did this? Punching some Hydra goons or something? Interrogating some terrorists who are known for hacking the unhackable?"

"I think the question that needs answered," Steve asked, looking pointedly somewhere to the left of the television, "Is when you and Hulk entered into a sexual relationship, for there to be tapes of a sexual nature in the first place."

"Hey grandpa," Tony said, bright white teeth glittering as his face contorted into a not-smile. "Who I fuck is none of your business, got that? We’re sensible adults, alright, we know what we’re doing."

"Sensible? With the Hulk?" Natasha gestured at Hulk’s bundled up form.

"Damn straight sensible with him. Haven’t you guys watched the tape? I mean, aside from the TV friendly clips they've been showing?"

The rest of the team shook their heads to the negative.

"Well if you had, you would've noticed that Hulk is probably the nicest guy in the world when it comes to fucking you. He’s memorized my boundaries by fucking heart and never asks me to do anything I hesitate about for even a fucking second! He’s probably the safest and sanest lover I've ever had." Tony said, gesturing to his boyfriend.

Hulk’s head shot up at that. He looked at Tony with an expression that was full of love and devotion. Steve had to turn away from them and actually look at the TV, which was showing the only clips it could of Tony and Hulk’s sex tape. It was less…intimate.

"Tony’s not…embarrassed?" Hulk asked. 

"Embarrassed?" Tony exclaimed. "Damn straight I’m embarrassed! Some bastard fucking hacked me! How could this happen?"

Hulk blinked at that.

"No. Tony not embarrassed about being with Hulk? Even with the TV people making fun of Tony for it?"

"You think I give a damn what those vultures say?"

"Hulk has a point Tony" Clint popped up. "You don’t think this is gonna affect your company at all? Or your reputation?"

Tony laughed at that. “Haven’t you heard birdbrain? I’m the bad boy inventor. It’s part of the package. It might make things rocky for a bit but fuck it. I thrive on pressure.”

Hulk unraveled out of his ball of shame and came toward Tony, staring down at him.

"Tony’s not….upset that everyone knows about Hulk and Tony?" He asked again, rubbing Tony’s side.

"Damn straight I’m not. We aren't doing anything wrong, no matter what those idiots say. It’s nothing twisted, sick or horrible. I mean, you gotta know that. When you’re touching me, does it feel wrong?"

Hulk shook his head.

"When we kiss, do you think you’re doing something sick?"

"No" Hulk growled.

"When you fuck me," Tony said, pressing against Hulk’s body, "is it horrible?"

"No," He whispered to his lover.

"Well then I’m not ashamed, are you?"

"Never."

Tony pulled on Hulk’s hair, to get him to lean down and they pressed their lips together slowly and just enjoyed holding each other for a bit.

"Good," Tony whispered into Hulk’s mouth. 

"If you’re gonna screw right here," Clint said, breaking the moment, "for gods sake, give us time to get a camera. Apparently video of you two fucking is a gold mine and I could use some cash."

They turned on him.

Clint didn't have time to guard himself from the barrage of pillows and cushions that rained down on him.


	5. The Body

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A story idea of my own. I just wanted to write Hulk dealing with grief. (Warning: character death)

Clint hit the rock before the team even had time to react.

They all screamed on their intercoms and tried to get to him first, to see if he was ok.

And yet, they all knew the answer to that.

Then they saw Hulk’s big green form jump onto the huge boulder and Clint’s body disappeared under a mass of green muscle. 

Thor and Tony arrived mere seconds later. They crept close to where their friends lay.

Thor laid a comforting hand on Hulk’s shoulder.

"Come, Hulk, we must take Clint home." His voice choked up with emotion.

Hulk made a low noise in his throat.

"I am truly sorry friend Hulk, I know how much Clint meant to you…to all of us."

Then the noise became louder. It was a rumbling growl coming from the back of Hulk’s throat.

"GET AWAY FROM US!" Hulk growled. 

Tony flipped his mask away from his face.

"Come on big guy…we need to get…the…Clint back home. You know he can’t last out in the open like this."

"CLINT’S FINE!" He bellowed, clenching his body even tighter around their fallen friend.

"You gotta know that’s not true. He couldn’t survive a fall like that." Tony said, trying to put a comforting hand on Hulk’s shoulder.

Hulk turned swiftly and punched Tony hard in the stomach, sending him flying. He barely turned on the suit’s rockets on time to save him from a very large freefall.

"NO ONE TOUCH HIM!" Hulk screamed, sending a group of birds in a nearby tree flying and screeching into the air.

"CLINT’S FINE! NO ONE TOUCH HIM!!!!" Then Hulk sat up and pulled Clint’s body onto his lap. One green hand supporting the body’s sagging head. 

After a while (too fucking long in Tony’s opinion) Steve and Natasha joined them.

Breathing heavily Natasha crept slowly toward Hulk.

"He can’t even support his own head, Hulk. Clint’s just not in there anymore. It’s a shell. A body."

"No." Hulk stated simply, looking into Natasha’s eyes. "Clint’s just sleeping. He hit his head and needs to sleep. Hulk will take him home when he wakes up."

Natasha turned her face away from his, for just a moment to wipe a stray tear from her face.

"There is no waking up from this. If there was, don’t you think I would be just as optimistic as you? You know how much I care for him, yes?"

Hulk nodded. “Natasha loves Clint. Just like Hulk. So Natasha should understand.”

"Understand what, Hulk?" she asked.

He took his free hand and began to comb the…corpse’s hair away from its face.

"Understand that Clint can’t be dead. Clint falls all the time and never dies. Clint can’t die."

Natasha slowly crept to his side and sat down, their hips touching.

"Anyone can die and everyone will, eventually."

Hulk sniffed at that, his eyes blurring.

"Not Hulk. Not Thor. Not Natasha."

"But that’s different we’re…."

"Not human." Thor supplied. "But Clint is….was."

Hulk shook his head quick at that. “Clint isn’t a was. Clint can’t be a was.”

"Why can’t he Hulk?" Natasha asked, putting her hand on his thigh.

"Because….because Hulk won’t let him be. Hulk won’t let you say he’s dead and put him in a box in the ground and cry over him and just….let him go away. Not Clint!"

"We won’t forget him, Hulk, you know that." Steve broke in.

"Yes you will," Hulk said. "You’ll throw him away like trash and he’ll be gone. Once he’s in the ground he’s gone and won’t ever come back and you’ll forget him. Forget his jokes. Forget his stupid laugh. Even forget what he looked like, or smelled like."

"He smelled like lavender," Natasha whispered. "He laughed like a donkey braying. He had a pushed in nose like a bulldog and loved Monty Python more than anything."

He turned to her, his tears now rushing down his face. “Won’t forget him? Like Banner and Hulk forgot mom?” He asked, whispering too.

She shook her head. “Even if we forget the little things, even if you and Bruce forgot how your mother smelled, that doesn’t mean we’ll forget the big things. Like how much Clint loved the team, or how much your mother loved you both.”

"Hulk will never forget. Never ever."

"And neither will I…neither will any of us." She squeezed his thigh and put her head on his shoulder.

She could barely make out what he said next, but it made her heart ache.

"Everyone Hulk loves will die, won’t they?"

She gently grabbed his face and turned him to look at her own wet face.

"Eventually, yes. That’s why we must enjoy them while they are alive. And, while I might not last as long as you, I should have a good long life to keep you company. If I’m enough for you."

Hulk leaned forward, putting his head against hers. “Hulk….Natasha’s not so bad.” He murmured. “Hulk’s glad he’ll have you.”

"I’m glad I’ll have you as well" She murmured back. And he silently got up and moved toward the team. Without a word, they took Clint’s body home.


	6. Playing Favorites

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51-pegasib requested: Hulk’s three favorite team members (and why)

The Avengers are Hulk’s team and he loves them. He will protect them no matter what, from anyone who dares to even look at them wrong.

He loves how good and nice Steve is.

and how Natasha is strong and unwavering, even in that tiny body.

But they aren’t his favorite Avengers, if he had to pick favorites.

Steve is too good sometimes. It makes Hulk feel like a bad person because he’ll never be as perfect as the Captain.

And Natasha is his team and he loves her but her entire life is built on lies and manipulation. Hulk hates both of those things very much.

It’s weird that he’d like Tony, Clint and Thor so much.

Tony, who is flashy, who pretends to be all sorts of different people, depending on where he is.

Tony, who teases Hulk and flirts with him.

Tony who makes him feel like a man, not a monster. And yet he does this by referring to Hulk as a monster, by using the word that no one dares to use around him and saying it as a good thing. Monster comes out of his mouth like sweetie and honey come out of the mouths of others.

Clint is Hulk’s best friend ever. He’s obnoxious. He calls Hulk names and throws things at him.

He also tells Hulk jokes at team meetings. Doing impressions of Fury and Hill and making Hulk crack up.

Then sulking because no one reprimands Hulk for laughing, only Clint for making him laugh. 

And Clint doesn’t treat Hulk like he’s stupid. He’s just a regular guy who doesn’t understand all the ultra brainy crap that comes out of Tony’s mouth.

Now Thor….how Hulk feels about Thor is so complicated.

He loves him. He loves to fight him. He loves and hates that this person can match him, punch for punch.

He hates that Thor thinks of him as a troll or beast.

He loves that Thor doesn’t care.

That Thor sees what he can do in a fight and thinks it’s wonderful. 

That Thor, more than any of them, understands the desire to hit and destroy and that it’s not about hurting people.

It’s not about being a large bully.

It’s about the beauty of testing your muscles and what you’re made of.

And about protecting the little people you could easily squash under one large fist.

Because they can’t very well do it themselves.


	7. Mini Matchmakers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51-pegasib requested: Hulk with his fans

Tony was ascorting Hulk through the crowd after an Avengers Q and A session when the big guy just…drifted away.

Someone as large as Hulk shouldn’t be able to slink off like that. 

Tony turned around this way and that looking for that large green mass of muscle.

He found him squatting on the floor in front of a group of small children.

Boys and girls, all wearing either his face, or decked out in green and purple.

Tony calmed his running gait into a smooth glide.

"Do you like my tutu?" a little girl asked, twirling around so that the green and purple twirled around her. Her shirt was also the green of Hulk’s skin.

"I wanted to be a ballerina and you but I couldn’t decide because I like both so I decided I’d be you as a ballerina."

"A Hulkerina" said a slightly older girl giggling.

"Gillian’s been saying that all day." Said a nearby boy, rolling his eyes.

"Shut it Gary." The older girl named Gillian said.

"It’s very nice" Hulk mumbled to the little girl. "What’s your name?"

"Cassidy. I’m glad you like it. You’re my favorite Avenger."

There were nods from the rest of the kids. Tony decided to stay put, so as not to ruin the moment.

"Hulk is?" Hulk asked, his eyes growing wide in shock.

"Mm hmm. Because you’re green and greens my favorite color and you like doggies and I like doggies and you can pick up cars in one hand." The girl rambled on, the smile on her face getting wider.

Then Gary decided to butt in. “And you growl like a lion when you hit things. You broke a window in our house once doing that. Mommy and Daddy were scared but I thought it was cool.”

Hulk patted the boy’s shoulder and said, “Hulk’s sorry. Tony can pay for that.” 

 _Hey! Who told Hulk he could make promises like that?_  Tony thought before pushing that away.

It wasn’t like he couldn’t afford it.

"You mean Iron Man?" Gary asked. "He’s cool too. I mean he can’t smash stuff like you and he doesn’t roar but flying’s pretty cool too."

_Pretty cool my ass._

"Iron Man’s nice too," Hulk said. "And not as stuck up as he looks on TV. He’s a good friend."

Then another little boy asked, “What about Thor? Does he go around the house breaking things with the hammer? Moolner?”

Hulk shook his head. “But he sings in the shower and you can hear it three floors down. Sounds like a train crash.”

The kids busted out in laughter.

"What about Black Widow? She’s really pretty." Gillian responded, her voice sounding starstruck.

"Not at 2 in the morning. You wake her up then and you’re in trouble."

Hulk definitely had a point there.

"You don’t think she’s pretty? I hear she’s Hawkeye’s girlfriend." Gillian responded.

"Do you have a girlfriend, Mr. Hulk?" Cassidy asked.

 _Huh_ , Tony thought looking at Hulk,  _he can actually blush_.

"Hulk doesn’t have a girlfriend." And Tony could swear little Cassidy’s smile got even wider.

Her first crush….Tony smiled. How would any man measure up?

"Boyfriend then?" Gillian asked. "Mr. Zeke who works at the store has a boyfriend named Trevor."

Hulk smiled at her and shook his head again. “No boyfriend either.”

"Why not?" She asked. "The other Avengers like you and they’re so pretty."

"Like Captain America." Another little girl said, dreamily.

"Or Thor." Gillian said. "I just want to braid his hair."

"They’re Hulk’s friends. And they already have people." He said, his voice sounding a little upset.

"And you’re all alone?" Gary asked.

"Hulks not alone" He said. "Hulk has friends. Has kids like you who like Hulk and talk to him."

"But still. You gotta watch them being all mushy and you have no one to be all mushy with. That sucks."

"Yeah! You should totally have a girlfriend." Cassidy said, stomping her foot.

"Or boyfriend," Gillian butted in.

"Come on, we should find him someone!" A new little voice popped in.

"Yeah!" The rest cheered.

"There’s gotta be someone for you too." Cassidy said. "You’re nice and strong and funny. And have a really deep voice that’s fun to listen to."

"And I bet you’d kill the bugs if your person wanted you to." Gillian said and she took Hulks hand, egging him to stand up.

With that, a sea of small fans pushed Hulk into the fray. 

Tony smiled and went to find the team. 

This was gonna be good.


	8. Clingy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my own ideas. Basically I wanted to write something where the others are surprised to find out that Hulk's the clingy one in his relationship with Clint but it ended up getting slightly darker b/c of a misunderstanding.

Hulk leaned back in his chair and pulled Clint even further on his lap. He looked down at the cards in Clint’s hand. Basically…they stunk.

Hulk had watched the team play poker enough to know that two nine’s wouldn’t cut it, unless everyone else happened to have stinkier cards,

which was almost impossible.

The rest of the Avengers were gathered around the table as well, all examining their own cards and some were counting their little fake chips.

Hulk leaned into the sunlight, enjoying not being trapped in the tower with it’s metal and glass. 

He thanked whatever god actually cared that Tony had balconies built on this place. 

Natasha laid her cards down. 

"Three please dealer"

"Three it is," Tony said, giving her three from the stack of cards in the middle. 

"Two please" Steve said and Tony repeated the gesture

"I believe I will stay with what I have" Thor said, a smug smile on his face.

Well, Hulk new what kind of hand Goldilocks had.

Clint raised his cards over his face so he could frown at them. Hulk rubbed his stomach soothingly, enjoying the feel of Clint’s body against his own. 

Clint leaned into him and sighed. Then with a fake cheerfulness he said “Three please” and laid his cards down. 

The exchange happened again and then Tony exchanged two cards of his own.

As Hulk expected, Thor had a flush.

But, Natasha won the round, having a stronger flush than Thor’s, which made Hulk snicker. 

He draped a hand on Clint’s thigh, under the table and began to stroke the muscle there, lightly. 

Clint just let it happen, happy to let Hulk get in all the touches he wanted. 

It wasn’t like Hulk was trying to start anything sexy, especially not in front of the others and definitely not without Clint making it clear that he wanted something sexy right now.

It was just….nice touching his boyfriend. Getting to soothe his tough skin, or play with his hair. 

Getting to hold Clint softly.

Maybe it was because neither he nor Clint was used to soft touches. That’s what Bruce thought anyway. Could be, Hulk thought. He just liked that Clint, who didn’t trust often, had no problem being held and touched by hands strong enough to crush mountains. 

Clint laid down another crappy hand and sighed. “Well losing my shirt to the team is fun and all, I gotta take a piss,” He said, jumping down from Hulk’s lap and sauntering inside. 

Hulk frowned as he watched him go. His arms and fingers ached for the feel of Clint’s skin.

"Didn’t know Birdy was such an attention hog." Tony muttered, giving Hulk a sideways glance. 

"Indeed. The Hawk, who is normally so standoffish, seems quite determined to constantly be in Hulk’s embrace," Thor commented.

Steve shrugged uncomfortably and Hulk knew why. It was because didn’t like talking about his team like this.

"It seems to work for you though, right? I mean you wouldn’t let him touch you all the time if you didn’t like it, would you?" He asked,a bit of concern in his voice.

"Yes, touching isn’t something that comes naturally to you is it?" Natasha asked, trying to make it sound like a regular conversation between friends.

Hulk felt the blood rush to his skin. He wanted to crawl under the table and hide from their prying eyes.

Could he really admit the truth?

Then again, did their weird questions leave him any other choice? Steve’s concern, like they were doing something hurtful and Natasha basically trying to do the sneaky spy thing for information, didn’t that mean he had to tell them the truth?

If only just to get the stupid conversation over with.

"You should know Hulk, that there’s such a thing as boundaries. And your friends and lovers must respect that. It’s healthy and necessary for any relationship." Steve continued.

Hulk resisted the urge to snort, like Steve knew so much about relationships.

"Hulk likes touching Clint." He said, forcing himself to look them in the eye, even as his entire face felt like it was going to catch on fire. 

"Hulk is the one who asks for touching." He said and before Steve could speak he raised his voice and continued.

"And Hulk only touches Clint and holds him when Clint says it’s ok. Clint knows that Hulk wont touch if Clint doesn’t want it. Clint and Hulk know about painful touching, know about being hurt with hands and arms that are supposed to love."

"And Hulk would rip his own arms off before using them to hurt his boyfriend ever!" Hulk said with a growl, clenching his fists. 

"Whoa, Hulk. I was just trying to make sure everything was ok, ok? I never accused anyone of…."

"What’s going on?" Clint asked, taking a sip of the beer he had just liberated from the fridge.

"The Captain made some assumptions that, because of their wording, left our companion feeling as though he had to stand up for the….integrity of your relationship with him." Thor said simply.

Steve stood up to contest that but Clint rolled over him.

"The integrity of our relationship?" Clint asked slowly, anger starting to form in his face.

"I wasn’t. I was…we, were wondering why two of the most standoffish people we know would be so…tactile when dating. I wanted to make sure that neither of my teammates felt obligated to act a certain way, even though it made them uncomfortable. I was not accusing anyone of anything." Steve said, blushing in anger and embarrassment. 

Clint blinked at that and looked at Hulk and then back at Steve.

"Well I can see how that didn’t go over well." Then he slowly advanced toward Hulk and climbed into his lap again. He pulled one of Hulk’s clenched fists around his waist and began to stroke the knuckles.

"Hulk has a…well do you know how many times he’s been called a monster and an abomination or a freak?" Clint asked, looking around the table.

"Too many fucking times." He said before any of them could interrupt. "And do you know how many times I’ve been treated like a killer or a time bomb? Not just in the past but recently? Plenty of times for any secret conversations about my behavior to set me on edge. 

"And you’re right, Steve. Most of the time I want my space and so does Hulk. But maybe, just maybe, because we’ve found someone we love and trust, someone who has our backs 100%. Someone who will never use the words freak or traitor or flinch back from our touch, that makes it easier for us to be "overtly tactile" with each other. 

I know you’re just lookin’ out for us, Steve and that’s great an all. But Hulk and I understand each other’s boundaries and needs like no one else could. And I’m tellin’ you, the day I need protection from him” and here Clint pointed a thumb at Hulk, “is the day when pigs’ll fly and I’ll actually win a fuckin’ poker game around here.”

Then Tony chocked out a laugh and the team started to breathe just a little easier. Hulk let his hands unclench and gave Steve a small smile, trying to show that the desire to punch him in his perfect face had passed. 

Steve smiled in return, gratefully understanding the message.


	9. Happy For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b requested: Hulk checking in on Betty Ross.

It’s surprising how someone as big as Hulk can be so good at hiding. 

Then again, Betty’s new lab does happen to be on the edge of a forest.

And Hulk is pretty good at charming the neighboring animals into being quiet. 

She’s on the third floor, walking back and forth in front of the window and reading a paper.

Her eyes are crinkled in concentration and worry.

Her hair is held up in a bun, a pencil sticking out of it. 

A long white lab coat billows behind her like a cape. 

She looks upset but Hulk knows that’s a lie

This is where she’s happiest. 

Someone comes running inside to tell her something. 

He is around her (their?) age.

Kind of pretty, in a normal kinda way.

Also has a billowing lab coat.

His arms flap about in excitement and Hulk can see his lips move faster and faster.

Betty slowly lays the troubling papers down and starts to unclench her muscles.

She turns her back to Hulk, but he watches her body become more lively. She jumps into the pretty (ish, he’s ok looking at least) man’s arms and they jump up and down. 

Then he rushes her to one of the computers on the side of the room and plugs something into it and they look at the screen, wearing identical smiles.

Betty pumps her fist into the air and some of her hair flies out of the bun and into her face. She swats it away and goes to some other papers, writing some stuff down quickly, tapping her foot on the floor.

It’s the first time she’s been so happy in years, Hulk realizes.

Running away from her father, from Abomination, from the world with Bruce/Hulk wasn’t happiness to her.

She loved them but it was…stressful. Dangerous.

There are guards everywhere here and no Hulk to bring trouble to her so she’s safe.

And happy.

And Hulk, no matter how much he loves her, would ruin it eventually.

But he pushes his own sad feelings away and smiles.

He loves her and she’s happy.

So he’ll try to be happy too.


	10. Warmth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An idea of mine. I liked the idea of Hulk not only being a source of heat, but his being able to use that to help Tony.

The large octopus thing wasn’t stupid

It knew that the Iron Man armor was the only thing protecting Tony from the cold water in the Hudson, where the thing was currently destroying ships and terrorizing the fishermen.

So, with a couple of ten foot long tentacles, the thing cracked open the armor like an egg and threw Tony into the water. 

Steve and Thor were slashing off tentacles, Clint and Nat were saving the scared fishermen in the water.

And Hulk….

Hulk was thrashing in the water, trying to save Tony.

He finally found him near the bottom. Tony had no problem swimming, normally, but this was different. 

There was blood on the back of his head, where he hit a rock before falling. 

The black pajama things he wore under the suit were soaked, with blood staining the back.

Tony’s eyes were closed and he wasn’t moving.

So Hulk sprang out of the water as hard as he could and ran to the shore as fast as he could, leaving the fight behind.

He laid Tony’s cold body on the ground and looked around, trying to figure out just what to do.

So he held Tony’s head up and tried to stop the bleeding there.

Eventually Clint came creeping out of the water.

"You need to get those clothes off."

"What?" Hulk asked, anger and disgust filling the word.

Clint came around to Tony’s other side and began to pull at his pajamas.

"Stop that!" Hulk roared, pulling Clint away.

"He’s  _cold_ , the suit thing is  _cold_ , he’s gonna go into hypothermia if we don’t warm him up. Which means getting him out of this.”

Then Hulk let Clint’s arms go and Clint finished getting Tony naked.

Tony’s head tossed in Hulk’s hand and then his eyes wavered open.

"Wha…." he exclaimed, and then he coughed up water.

His entire body shook with every cough.

"Pull him up!" Clint exclaimed. "Pat his back. Not too rough now." He advised. 

Hulk patted Tony as soft/hard as he could, water spilling out of Tony’s mouth and down his naked chest. His skin prickled with goosebumps and he shivered and coughed, causing both Clint and Hulk to flinch at the same time.

Then, thankfully, the water stopped leaking from Tony’s face.

Clint started rubbing Tony’s legs and feet. Hulk, trying to be proactive, repeated the movement on Tony’s chest.

"Mmm," Tony mumbled, his eyes unfocused. "Hulk is….so warm."

His eyes rolled back and he leaned into Hulk.

Clint’s eyes shot up at that, his face beaming with….something.

"Thats it! Hulk, you’re basically a fuckin’ furnace. Here, lay down beside him.

Hulk did what he was told.

"Now, let’s move him on his side," Hulk did that too.

"And this is really important, you got that big guy?" Hulk nodded so hard that his hair bobbed in his eyes.

"Wrap your arms around him and hold him as close as you can."

Hulk’s face must have shown what he thought of that.

"Tony needs to be warm. You radiate heat. He needs you now more than ever."

Hulk nodded and went to “work”

He pressed Tony against his chest and wrapped one large arm around Tony’s waist, using the other hand to rub his legs and thighs.

Tony’s clammy skin was starting to warm, just a bit. His lips were losing their scary purple color and….yes, he was blinking again.

"Hands….so cold…" he whispered, shivering.

Hulk grabbed his hands in one of his and rubbed them together. 

Hulk imagined he could feel his warmth flowing through Tony’s skin, spreading also his life and strength through his injured body.

Clint opened Tony’s eyes with his fingers and began to talk.

"Come on, wake up. Let us see that cocky ass smile. Come on!"

Tony pressed closer to Hulk, using his large upper arm as a pillow.

"Tired….so tired."

Clint pulled his hair.

"You can’t sleep!" he yelled. "You got a concussion, you know what you gotta do, smart guy."

Tony held his eyes open, barely.

Hulk continued rubbing his body down with one hand, while keeping him close with the other.

He laid his head against Tony’s neck, breathing hot air there as well, watching Tony’s hair start to dry.

The color was starting to come back into Tony’s skin as he mumbled out words to answer Clint’s questions.

Hulk didn’t bother to think about what they were saying, concentrating all his body and mind on making Tony warm.

It was funny, that Hulk being Hulk was gonna save Tony’s life.

That what made him a monster is what Tony needed to get better.

If Banner had never been in that accident…..

No one would exist to fill Tony with their warmth

To hold him in their searing arms.

Tony would be…..dead.

Instead he started moving around in Hulk’s arms, the shaking almost over and his voice sounding stronger, better.

And Hulk didn’t need to punch someone/something to help him.

Or scare anyone to make Tony better or safer.

Instead….

All Hulk had to do to save his friend was hold him.

To put his head against Tony’s neck and touch his body, hoping that this person he loved so much would be OK.

Hulk didn’t have to destroy to save. He could save someone by being soft and sweet.

Hulk almost shook at those thoughts but he was interrupted.

The others, octopus blood covering them, had arrived.

"We need to get him to a hospital," Steve asked, worried.

Hulk squeezed Tony toward him, looking him in the eye for the first time.

"Ready to go?" Hulk asked, softly.

"Yeah, thanks to you." Tony repeated, lazily stroking Hulk’s chest.

Hulk gave him a huge smile before taking off. 


	11. Sometimes Dead is Better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An idea of mine. I just like the idea of Hulk commenting on the fact that the avengers know so many people who were "supposed to be dead" or "almost dead"

Hulk crouches in the dirt, rain pouring over his shoulders.

He scoops up the sand and throws it over his shoulder, over and over again.

He and Banner were so _stupid_  not to think of this before.

Captain America was supposed to be dead.

He was just frozen in ice.

Tony was said to be dead,

but he wasn’t.

Pepper was almost dead

but she came back changed.

Bucky Barnes was supposed to be dead

"But he was brainwashed and crazy" Hulk gritted out to himself, shoveling back another feet of dirt.

And the SHIELD Agent

"Phil pretended to be dead, but isn’t."

Almost everyone around Hulk who was supposed to be dead….

Hell, Cap was almost dead, again, but didn’t die.

With each handful of dirt, he counts them out.

1\. supposed to be dead steve

2\. said to be dead Tony

3\. Almost dead pepper

4\. crazyalive Bucky Barnes

5\. Phil pretend dead

6\. Steve should be dead but not.

His large arms shake

the wooden box shows out from the dirt

Stevesupposed to be dead, Tonysaid to be dead, almostdead pepper, crazyalivebucky…philpretenddead steveshouldbedeadbutnot.

He can’t open the box

he doesn’t  _want_  to. 

What’s supposed to be dead never is

Steve Tony Pepper Bucky Phil Steve again

He pulls away from the box and wrapshis arms around his chest.

Nonononono

can’t open it

don’t wanna know

….have to know

have to protect them

the rain belts down on his shoulders and he cries.

has to be dead

but everyone who had to be dead wasn’t

steve tony pepper bucky steve again phil

"Steve, Tony, Pepper, Bucky, Steve again, Phil" He says it over and over and over and the wind tells him he’s crazy.

dangerous.

He finally, finally breaks into the stupid box and lets himself look in.

Hulk lets out a scream of triumph

The body is there.

His body is there.

Hulk sniffs at the black/gray hairs

the smell isn’t really there

but the body, the fucking body, is

and it’s about the size he remembered.

Hulk reaches in and breaks off a bone.

He’ll leave it for Banner. To test. to be sure.

That their father is dead.

Like he’s supposed to be.


	12. Smell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another prompt based on my own idea. I just like the thought of Hulk and "marking his territory" so to speak.

This was one of the few times Bruce ever ever ever said that Hulk had a good idea.

And it made him cry a little, inside.

Hulk thought that was quite funny.

So, while the rest of the Avengers got ready for their big meeting with the Pack (what the stupid werewolf people called themselves. With the capitol P and everything) Bruce spent time in his lab, messing with the samples Hulk had made Tony draw.

Then all Banner had to do was make sure they got where they needed to go (which was easy because Banner could be freaky sneaky)

By the time their meeting day arrived, Hulk was ready to put his plan into focus.

The gang met the Pack leaders in the outskirts of the woods, all of them a little on edge. Hulk looked each of them in the eyes, daring them to look away

And, eventually they did.

 _Looks like your idea is gonna work after all_. Banner said in the back of his mind.

 _Of course_. Hulk sent back.

Banner might be the smart one when it came to stupid science stuff, but Hulk understood animals.

Then the Leader circled them all in turn, her bright green eyes narrowing as she sized them up. She leaned in and sniffed them, lightly, until she got to Hulk.

Then she took one big whiff, her eyes darting to his face and then quickly darting back. The rest of the avengers took the sniffing with confusion or anger, but Hulk smiled, his arms crossed against his chest.

Then the leader woman went to her gang of wolves, about 7 overall and they whispered to each other, or at least they thought they were whispering.

Hulk heard it all. They were reacting exactly as he knew they would.

The leader woman came back. Cap opened his mouth to address her, but she slipped past him to where Hulk was standing.

"Your pack has made us great offerings and this alliance is beneficial to us both. But rest assured, if we are wronged we will fight back."

Hulk huffed a breath at her. “Avengers will help you, but will not serve you. Ever.”

One of the lower members started circling around the group, his mouth was open and he was dripping drool. He was very thin and starving. Willing to try anything.

Then the leader woman snapped him up and pulled him away. “Are you crazy?” She spat at him, not even bothering to hide her anger in front of outsiders. “You would attack the big green one’s pack? You cannot feed if you’re dead!” She pushed him to his knees in front of the Avengers, and made him bow his head.

"I apologize for his behavior, rest assured that the rest of us will respect this alliance."

"You better" Hulk said from the back, glaring at her and making sure to hold his body in a way where she could see all his muscles at work. Then he opened his mouth and bared his teeth, looking her right in the eye.

She looked down at her feet, her shoulders hung in shame.

"We will."

And, with little fanfare, they retreated into the woods.

"Ok, what was that?" Clint asked, turning back and forth from Steve to Hulk. "Since when does big green take point on diplomatic missions?"

"Since we’re dealing with animal people." Hulk said. "Needed to deal with them their way."

"But why did they assume you were the pack leader or whatever?" Clint asked again, keeping his gaze on Hulk.

"Because Hulk wanted them to. It was a pretty creative plan, actually." Tony piped up. 

"You were in on this?" Clint asked. And even Natasha was shocked.

"As a matter of fact I was, Gotta love it when even the resident spies have no fucking clue when a secret plan is going on. See, Hulk decided, with mine and Bruce’s help, that the only thing our new allies would understand is the language of chemicals, of scent. And because animals also understand that Hulk is the strongest creature in existence, they would see him as an authority so…."

Hulk had to interrupt him. Tony was great but he never just said things.

"Tony took smell chemical stuff from Hulk. Banner put it on Avengers clothes. Avengers marked as Hulk;s. So werewolves know not to hurt team."

"You marked us?" Natasha asked, her mouth drawing into a tight little line.

Tony looked like he was about to launch into more long winded talking so Hulk did them all a favor and talked first. 

"Wolves understand packs and belonging. Belonging to each other, protecting each other. Hulk wanted to talk using their words. Avengers are Hulk’s. Hulk is the Avenger’s."

And then he shut up. If they didn’t get it now….

"That was really smart of you buddy." Steve said, patting Hulk on one large forearm. "I think they definitely got the picture."

Natasha looked away for a bit, her mind far away. Then she sighed. “It was a ruse, in a way. Talking to the mark in a way they’d understand. With their own power dynamic. Which is….tolerable. If not preferable.”

"Hulk did it to protect, is all. Not to control. Or to hurt." 

Natasha smiled at him, her lips barely curving. “And that is what makes it tolerable.”

He tried to smile back. “Hulk had to protect his pack. Will always protect.”

"As long as that’s the only pack shit you expect us to go along with." Clint responded. "because that giving you the best food and showing you our belly shit ain’t gonna happen."

Tony laughed and responded. “And no sexual pecking order as well. I doubt any of us have lovers that would agree to that.”

"The Lady Jane might find such an event quite entertaining." Thor mused.

"What?" Tony asked, his eyes going big at the idea of weird sex stuff.

"Just merely musing aloud." He said, pretending to imagine something really sexy.

"Seriously though, Jane isn’t, you know, that adventurous, right?" Tony asked, saddling up to Thor as they began to walk away.

"That is for me and possibly our green companion to know…" He trailed off, fighting away a smile.

"No Thor, you don’t get to do that, that’s psychological torture and against the rules of the Geneva convention, tell him Steve."

"I’ve told you before, Tony, we are not obligated to share with you the details of our sex lives!" 

Hulk followed behind them, listening to their chatter with a smile.

 _My pack_ , he thought, laughing to himself. 


	13. Romance: Hulk style

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b asked you: Three times hulk failed at romance and one time he succeeded.

1.

The flowers were a mistake.

Hulk saw them, thought they were pretty and ripped them right out of the ground.

Apparently the flowers at the White House Rose Garden weren’t for picking to make stupid archers fall in love with you.

It started what the angry pirate at SHIELD called a “national incident”

Metal Man promised to smooth things over with the president.

2.

The chocolate was supposed to go better. 

It came in a heart and Hulk liked that.

And Hulk loved chocolates, not as much as Clint, but a lot.

He figured, give what I love to who I love.

Hulk put them in the fridge.

But Thor got hungry in the middle of the night.

Hulk threw him through a window.

And didn’t enjoy it as much as he should have.

3.

Now, he knew the poem was a mistake.

Words made him uncomfortable.

And poetry was stupid.

But it was also “romantic” apparently.

So he tried.

And tore up page after page.

His biggest success started with the lines “You smell like happiness. And make me laugh. And feel all warm in my stomach, like really good food”

It was all he could think to say. 

Before he could crumple it up, Spider lady swooped in (she never walked like normal people, she either creeped or swooped) and grabbed.

She shook her head.

"Poetry just isn’t you, Hulk. You need to tell him your way."

She threw the poem in the trash and mumbled “idiot”

but with a smile in her voice.

+1

Clint jumped onto the cliff

Landed on his toes

and then fell back down.

He reached to launch a grippy arrow to save himself,

and the stupid thing fell out of his hands.

"Help! This is very not good!" He screamed into his ear speaker.

Metal Man acted like he was gonna fly up, but before his feet left the ground, Hulk was in the air.

And a few seconds later, Clint was in his arms.

Hulk leaped and got Clint on the cliff ground again.

Before Cupid could speak, Hulk got him in his arms again. He stood there, listening to the archer breathe.

In and out

In and out

Hulk could listen to it all day.

Clint rested his head on Hulk’s neck.

"Stop scaring Hulk like that." Hulk said, trying to make his voice gentle.

"I didn’t exactly do it on purpose, Jolly Green, it just sorta happened."

"Be more careful."

"I was as careful as I coulda been."

Hulk growled a little. 

"No you weren’t. Stop acting like you can fly." 

"Hey, it all turned out alright!" He exclaimed, raising his head up.

"But you could have been smashed." Hulk said, turning his head away.

"I wasn’t though, I’m ok. Look at me, man, I’m ok." Clint put his hand on Hulk’s cheek and got him to look into his eyes.

Hulk looked right into Clint’s shiny green eyes and could feel tears in his own.

"Hulk can’t loose you. Hulk loves you."

He flinched and dropped the archer into the dirt.

"Owww. Helluva way to show the love, Hulk." He said as he rubbed his back.

"Hulk….Hulk sorry, Hulk takes it all back."

"No! There are no take backs, dude, not with something like this. And if you help me up, I might just return the sentiment."

Hulk lifted him up in one swift movement.

And Clint kissed him right on the mouth.


	14. The Hulk Collects

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b asked you: Strange things Hulk has brought back to team HQ and how the team deals with them.

Hulk loved animals and the Avengers knew this.

The occasional puppy or bird they could deal with.

But the dinosaur egg from the Savage Land was a bit much.

He insisted on raising it as his own, naming the huge orange T-Rex Spot.

It set fire to countless walls and furniture.

Tried to eat Mjolnir.

And Clint.

Steve told him, in his most stern “I am Captain America and you will listen to me” voice to get rid of it.

Hulk insisted that he could train Spot, that he was a good dinosaur, really.

Hulk trained the thing to only set fire to certain things.

Like Hydra tanks

And Thor’s hair (Hulk insisted he would’ve stopped the fire before Goldilocks got hurt)

Then there was Cerberus.

Hercules wanted Hulk to babysit but Hulk didn’t want to give the “huge angry doggy” back.

Hulk headlocked Herc into agreeing to joint custody.

Tony bought gallons of dog food and designed some insanely huge and sturdy dog toys.

And hired a team of cleaners to get rid of any “messes”.

But the weirdest thing came out of the portal to another dimension.

Tony refused to call it an “alternate universe”

Though that was damn well what it was.

They even had Avengers there and it seemed like every damn hero was part of it.

Tony’s other was taller than him (the bastard)

but more of an asshole too, as he was quick to point out.

And Other Hulk….Well, their Hulk was more than tore up at all that had happened to his counterpart.

"I WILL NEVER SHIP YOU INTO SPACE!!!" Tony screamed in a drunken stupor at his giant green friend, after they found out the full story of the other Hulk.

After investigating it, they decided to close the portal, it hurt too much, caused too much speculation about what could happen, or what could have possibly been different, with the real them’s and their others.

Too many heartbreaking questions of “am I the real me, or is that person the real me?

And other things they didn’t want to deal with.

But Hulk brought a couple of things through.

Well….not things.

"Put them back, Hulk!" Steve exclaimed.

"THEY BELONG TO HULK!" Hulk yelled, putting his arms around the barbarians his other had brought into that world.

"They are not!"

"They’re Hulks!"

Lyra and Skaar stared at the other Avengers with a mix of weariness and curiosity.

"We would like to investigate this other place" Lyra said, with stilted words.

"Fight the monsters on this side." Skaar pointed out.

"Fight beside Hulk!" Hulk exclaimed, beaming. "Hulk’s children."

He glowed with pride, looking at them both.

"Could be good, you know, kinda like ‘diplomatic relations with an alternate universe. And hell, what if we need the other side’s help sometime? Might be good to have a little back and forth." Clint said.

"And it’s not like we could make them go anywhere they didn’t want to." Natasha remarked.

"Come with  me, kids." Hulk said, smiling brightly.

He practically drug them off to explore the tower.

Before they were out of sight, they heard Skaar say “He’s not like our Hulk, is he?”

But they allowed themselves to be drug.

Steve shook his head “Well…might be good for him”

Tony nodded, remembering that they had also said the same thing about Spot and Cerberus.


	15. Babies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasib requested: HULK WITH KITTENS. ADORABILITY

He found them in a dumpster of all places.

Their eyes weren’t open yet.

They had huddled against each other for warmpth

Two of them were all over yellow

Two were pure black

And only one of them had the strength to cry out.

The little mews of the biggest black kitten broke his heart.

The whole thing broke his heart.

So he found a discarded box 

(and stole the warmest blanket he could find, he was sure the other Avengers would understand)

wrapped them up and took them home.

Big kitten mewed over and over again, but never moved from the other kitties, who were sleeping. 

Hulk rubbed them each in turn with one big hand, hoping the heat from him would help them, heal them.

The others just kept sleeping but big kitten leaned into his hand, the mewing giving way to purring.

Hulk smiled and gave it a little scritch behind the ears.

JARVIS spoke up then, making Hulk and therefore the box of kittens in his lap, jump.

"If I may suggest, you might try feeding them. They must be hungry."

Hulk pondered that.

"Feed kittens what?"

"Milk, Mr. Hulk. You’ll probably need an eyedropper as well. I could order them delivered, if you like"

"Yes."

JARVIS usually made Hulk nervous. A voice without a face, a nonperson with a person’s mind. Someone who existed…in a way…who Hulk couldn’t smash if he had to.

But Hulk wouldn’t even have thought of the milk without him. So maybe the non-person JARVIS was ok.

After about an hour, the kittens started to move. They rolled back and forth, all over each other and the box, their sightless heads turning this way and that, like they were trying to see with their heads.

They mewed over and over, just trying to figure out where they were and why.

Hulk moved to pet one of the yellow ones, but the kitten moved away from him quickly, butting into one of it’s brothers/sisters?

The other kitten fell on its side and stumbled trying to get back up.

"It’s okay, yellowy, You’re safe." Hulk said in his lowest voice.

Yellowy kitten #1 still shied away.

But Yellowy kitten #2 slowly moved toward Hulk’s huge fingers and began to sniff them. 

And then to rub its head against them. Hulk patted it on the back and the kitten leaned into him. 

He couldn’t help smiling. “Pretty kitties” He half whispered.

"Hulk’s pretty kitties. Feel better now, huh? Safe and warm. Gonna have milk soon. And beds. And blankets and toys."

He could see it in his mind, the kittens getting older, coming to love Hulk and the Avengers as their family. Getting bigger on the best food Tony could buy. Running around and playing and getting into trouble.

"And Tony will buy you the best toys." He said, petting the big kitty, who was too little and too hungry to care about toys.

But when they were bigger,  _then_  Tony would buy them the best toys.

And the Avengers would love them and pet them.

Though the kittens were Hulk’s.

And maybe even Banner would realize….

Banner would realize that Hulk wasn’t so bad.

Maybe even that Hulk could be good with babies. 

Not just baby kittens but even baby-babies. 

And Hulk could have these fur babies and his own babies (his and Banner’s babies)

And Banner wouldn’t constantly be afraid of Hulk, be afraid to let Hulk out and near the people they loved.

"We’ll show him, won’t we?" Hulk asked the big black kitty.

The kitty purred and Hulk took that as a yes.

 

 


	16. Give and Take

Throwing Clint on the bed was easy.

But it was also really hard.

It wasn’t how Hulk though sex was supposed to be.

They called it “making love” sometimes and throwing someone around, ripping their clothes, didn’t sound like love was being made at all.

_"I just…I want you to just throw me down and take it, big guy. Don’t hold back, just…give it to me. Make me take it."_

Take….that didn’t sound like love either. Sex wasn’t supposed to be about take, it was supposed to be about give.

Hulk didn’t have a problem ripping Clint’s shirt off. Clint flinched back and Hulk just put an arm across his back to keep him still.

And that was easy. So easy to just throw down and take.

But also, not easy  _at all._

_"You’re just full of all this strength and I can’t help thinkin’, ‘man how would it feel to have some of that used on me.’ To know that you want it so bad you just can’t wait for the kissing and shit, you just need to put it in me. God, you don’t know how hot that sounds."_

Hulk planted a rough kiss on Clint’s neck. Pulled his hair back and bit him, as soft/hard as he could.

Clint moaned.

His eyes teared up.

But Clint didn’t say the word. So Hulk couldn’t stop.

He ripped pants and underwear, leaving Clint naked on his stomach.

Hulk pushed his ass up in the air and spread his legs.

Clint wanted rough and animal, so Hulk just growled at how good Clint looked like that.

Hulk rubbed his penis against Clint’s backside.

"Gonna take what’s mine." Hulk whispered in Clint’s ear. It was probably the only phrase Clint would want to hear.

"Oh God," Clint whispered.

Hulk grabbed both of Clint’s thighs and spread his legs further. Trying to hurt

Trying to not hurt too much, but in the weird good way that Clint liked.

Clint cried out but let his legs be moved.

Clint’s own penis started leaking on the bed. 

The archer grabbed it and started to stroke it.

Hulk was on him, like Clint wanted.

He grabbed Clint’s wrist hard and made it lay flat on the bed.

"No!" He growled. "MINE!" 

He grabbed Clint’s penis and pumped. Too hard, he knew. Too painful.

But Clint moaned louder so Hulk kept doing it.

Clint pushed his face into the mattress so Hulk wouldn’t hear but Hulk heard anyway.

"More" he whispered.

More? Hulk wondered. What more did he want? Hulk to tear him apart? To bruise him and bite him and make him bleed?

Is that what Clint wanted Hulk for?

He bit him on the shoulder and started to suck on the skin. Clint cried out and came in Hulk’s hand.

"Sorry…I…should have waited for permission. It just felt so good…"

Oh no.

Did Clint want to be punished too? 

Hulk went to the worst part of himself, the nastiest inside the head voice he had and he knew how to punish his boyfriend.

"Made Hulk dirty," He grunted, pushing his dirty hand in front of Clint’s face.

"Lick it off."

Clint licked his own stuff of Hulk’s hand, sucking on the sides of his fingers and licking between them.

Trying to do a good job.

Trying to apologize for enjoying having his penis touched.

For getting off.

When his hand was clean, Hulk stuck his fingers (or the tips of them anyway) in Clint’s mouth.

"Suck." He growled, pushing his own hardness between Clint’s cheeks.

He hoped Clint would understand why and suck his fingers really good.

And the archer did.

He even moaned as he did it, knowing that those huge fingers would be stretching him open. Without the wet stuff they normally used.

With Clint only slightly stretched by one of their plugs.

The better to hurt him.

Hulk pulled his fingers away and a bit of spit trailed from Clint’s lips to Hulk’s fingers and Clint reached out to lick it up, before it got on the bed. He licked his lips like it tasted so good.

Clint looked up at Hulk, eyes still watery, face flushed, looking for praise.

"Good." Hulk whispered, kissing his boyfriend on the head. Clint blinked a bit and Hulk realized he wasn’t being mean enough.

Taking enough. Being rough enough.

"Good slut."

And Clint’s eyes got dilated

Hulk only knew it was a thing people liked, the “good slut” thing, because of Clint’s porn videos.

Hulk pushed part of a wet finger in.

Clint screamed.

Hulk pushed on.

Not in the soft/nice way he usually did. 

Kissing Clint’s legs and butt and thighs.

Whispering “Love you” against skin.

He didn’t even stick his tongue in first and flick it around, to feel Clint thrust against it.

Just pushed and took. Because the Hulk Clint wanted was like that.

He ripped and grabbed and growled and took. And that Hulk only wanted to stick his penis….no, it would be cock when it takes, wouldn’t it?

Inside Clint and push and push, even with Clint soft and tired. 

Two fingers taking and Clint’s crying on the pillows.

"Please Hulk."

"It hurts it…."

But those weren’t the word.

So he had to thrust and use the third finger.

Had to stick his tongue in Clint’s mouth to ‘shut him up’. 

He grabbed Clint’s hair so hard that some of it came off in his hand and made Clint take his tongue, filling his mouth and making him respond.

Then he pushed Clint’s head on the pillows.

"Shut up." He growled. "Take it."

He got the wet stuff and got his penis ready. He refused to use spit all the way, no matter how much pain Clint wanted.

Clint bit on a piece of cover to keep from speaking

or screaming.

Because he’d get punished if he did, wouldn’t he?

Hulk grabbed onto his hips and made his ass go higher in the air. He made sure to dig huge fingers into skin when he started thrusting.

Muffled screams from the covers, but still not the word.

So he pushed harder.

And made sure to growl like an animal because it was so warm and so tight and it was Clint under him and oh god, having Clint, making him feel good, he loved it.

He dug his nails into Clint. The word still wasn’t there.

The word was to protect Clint. To make sure Hulk didn’t go too far.

Didn’t hurt him in a non fun way. 

Didn’t tear him apart and make him scared.

Leave the non fun bruises

Make him bleed.

Bleeding and scared

Bleeding and scared and open and having Hulk’s semen inside of him, shaking and begging to stop.

Sinking to his knees when Hulk wanted sex. Because he was too scared to say no.

Saying yes to Hulk only because he was so scared of pain and didn’t want to upset the monster.

Crying and being afraid. But too afraid to leave.

Being torn apart on the inside.

And bloody on the outside.

Hulk’s penis started to go soft and he was shaking.

No!

Can’t go soft. 

Have to do this for Clint.

Don’t think of Clint hurt and scared and afraid and crying and naked and shaking and….

But Clint was shaking and screaming into covers because Hulk told him to shut up and would the monster hurt him if he screamed?

"Hulk." Clint said around a mouth full of material.

"Hulk’s taking Clint, like he wanted." Hulk said softly. His throat hurt from all the growling and meanness.

"Hulk…come on…"

"Hulk take. Hulk rip and growl and take. Just what Clint likes."

"Hulk…sweetheart….you’re crying, did you notice that?"

What?

Hulk slowed his thrusts and put one hand to his face.

Wetness.

Clint didn’t say he wanted rough and taking and crying.

Hulk wasn’t doing it right.

Wasn’t giving Clint what he wanted. 

So he tried to thrust his half hard penis extra hard but the tears would not stop.

"Say the word, if you wanna stop. Say the word baby, say it please. Tell me what you need. Tell me if you’re not ok."

The word wasn’t for Hulk.

Hulk didn’t need protected.

He was the monster.

He was the taker

He could only stop if Clint said the word. Why would he stop giving Clint what he wanted because he didn’t like it?

Making Clint take it wouldn’t hurt Hulk any.

He wouldn’t be the one with bruises.

He kissed Clint’s neck, probably too softly.

"Hulk’s taking. Hulk’s being mean. Being the monster." He sucked on Clint’s ear. "Being the monster for you."

His entire body shook, the tears made it hard to see.

"Hulk wants to make you feel good. Wants to….be good. be bad/good for Clint."

"Have to…Have to hurt Clint. Make him feel good."

"Do you feel good Hulk? Do you like it?" Clint said, reaching back to touch any bit of green skin he could find.

"Doesn’t matter." Hulk muttered.

"Red." Clint croaked, his voice sore from screaming.

Hulk pulled out of him faster than he should have been able too. 

Began kissing Clint all over and petting and loving.

Shaking and wondering how Clint could ever forgive him.


	17. Smash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b asked you: Three times Hulk smashed something satisfying and one time he decided not to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The +1 part is based on something that actually happened in the comics, though the roster of the team was a bit different.

1\. The Tank

Hulk hates tanks.

And even he understands that this is an understatement.

He thinks of them as the ear hurting machines with guns and nets and yelling and “Hulk is a monster”. But tank sums it up pretty well.

So when the Avengers are fighting the League of Evil Mutants and the army decides to show up (it kind of hurts Hulk to beat up on people the world hates as much or more than him) he turns from the annoying diamond lady to slam his whole body into the machine and feel it crunch against him.

He reaches into the dead machine and pulls the screaming humans out of it, flinging them to the side and out of the way. 

Then he rips it into little pieces, knowing that this tank will never bother him again.

He growls in triumph and then starts on the diamond lady again.

 

2\. The Gamma Ray

Hulk likes being hulk, mostly

He doesn’t care about how weird his green skin is. 

He hates that people scream and run away from them.

But he also really, really hates the Gamma Ray.

The Leader thinks that, hey, if everyone was a Hulk, or a gamma mutant, that the world would be better.

That they would be considered kings of the new gamma-fied people of the world.

Hulk knows better.

Instead, they’d have the entire world walking around with superpowers and feeling like freaks.

Hating their own skin.

And maybe they’d find something else to hate each other about (like, maybe some of them would be super smart like the Leader and others….others would be Hulk)

So he looks at the ray and back at the Leader, who is doing the same old “join me Hulk” shit that never works and Hulk decides to save the world from being freaks like he is.

He snaps the pointy end of the ray off in one great fist and bashes the Leader with it a bit, until he’s down for the count.

The Leader screams with every smack, protesting that Hulk is ruining their only chance, that the gamma ray is their only hope of being in a world that appreciates them.

Leader doesn’t know that the gamma rays destroyed that long ago.

So Hulk takes the pain of that, and destroys the machine, absorbing the gamma rays that made him what he is, and saving others from that same fate.

 

3\. The Clown car

Now this is just fun.

Hulk laughs because the thing has a big, red honking nose at the end of it.

And there are about 30 clowns jammed into it.

Evil, robber clowns.

Fighting his friends with rubber mallets and running away in huge yellow shoes when Thor breaks out his not rubber hammer.

He hits the nose over and over, and it honks every time.

Three or four clowns pile on his back, trying to bring him down and he’s getting white clown makeup all over his back and that’s even funnier.

Hawkeye, from the roof, is shouting the lyrics to “Send in the Clowns” as they pile out of their ugly car.

And every time another one exits, looking like a complete idiot, Hulk laughs harder.

This is the only time clowns have ever been funny.

 

+1 Team

Well now he knows how they feel about him.

Each and every one.

With the help of the evil lady, he has seen their fear.

Their nightmares of Hulk smashing and smashing until everything is dead.

They shake at fear of him now.

Of what he’ll do.

Clint at least apologizes, tries to be better.

Promises to become better.

For his friend.

Even offers to let Hulk lay one on him,

punish him for his mind’s betrayal.

Make him bleed, maybe.

Hulk grinds his teeth together and pats the Hawk on the shoulder.

He looks at his “team” and says “Hulk is better than that”

And walks away.


	18. Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b asked you: Hulk pining after something fragile, breakable or too small (and how the team helped him get it).

Hulk sees the angel in the window and wants it immediately.

He stops in the middle of a fight to stare at the thing.

It is small enough to be smothered in the palm of his great big hands and he wants to cradle it there and just stare at it.

Her curly brown hair and kind eyes,

the way she tells him that it will all be alright,

the way another angel told Banner it would all be alright years ago.

She is made of glass, he can tell.

She would be broken like the other, and he would be the one to do it this time.

She is safer hidden away from everyone.

So he walks away.

….

A week later he is back again.

Different battle, same angel.

He wonders why no one has bought her yet.

Then he notices the crack beside her head.

Almost all the stuff in the store is a little dirty,

a little cracked.

And no one wants broken things.

……..

A month has passed and she’s still there.

Smiling at him, and he thinks, if she could talk she’d say hello, I missed you Hulk.

Her dress is light blue and her eyes are hazel.

Her face is a little dirty.

But she is so beautiful.

…….

Two months.

This is the only way he can see her.

The only way to spend time with her in a place where she can’t be hurt.

If he could go back in time he’d put the other behind a window.

…only, he really wouldn’t.

Because he wouldn’t want anyone he loved caged like an animal, 

even if it was to keep them whole.

…….

Six months.

He goes by the window and she’s gone.

Tears streak down his face before he even realizes he’s sad.

Do they love her?

the people who have the angel?

will the protect her, or let her be broken?

maybe break her themselves, in a rage.

He sobs all the way to the tower.

……..

All the avengers are waiting for him in the common room.

Tony is almost bouncing on the couch with excitement.

Even Natasha is more smiley than usual.

He quickly wipes at his face, hoping they didn’t see the water.

Finally Tony bursts out with “Natasha! Give him the thing already!” 

She huffs and pretends to be mad at him for being impatient.

But she reaches into a bag and pulls out something in a box.

And….it’s her.

…….

Hulk cries again.

Can’t wipe away tears fast enough.

"Saw you looking at this in the window of that second hand place, thought you’d want her here with you." Natasha says, trying to be less smiley and more cold.

But her smile wipes almost as well as Hulk’s tears.

His hands shake and he puts them behind his back.

"Don’t want." He says, voice weak.

Natasha frowns.

"But you’ve been staring at this for months!" She says.

"Don’t want her. Will break her. Don’t wanna…." He shakes his head back and forth.

Too beautiful, too sweet to break. 

Bruce and Hulk break everything they touch.

Angel already broken enough, can’t bear to do it.

To love her to death.

"You won’t break her. You just have to be careful." Nat says, coming closer.

Hulk backs away, “No don’t…”

Natasha sneaks the box into his hands.

"If you really want, you can always keep her in this box. She’ll be safe there."

He tries to keep his body perfectly still.

"Hulk will break, Hulk always…."

She turns away and takes a breath, then faces him again.

"Not always. Not with us and not with her." 

'Hulk will break. Hulk will hurt he….”

Natasha snatches the angel away and Hulk almost crumples on the floor.

"You don’t want to hurt her, then don’t. You want her safe, then keep her that way. That’s how it works. This….you were created as a bomb, a killing machine, but that is not something you have to choose."

She shakes the angel up and down as she speaks, her voice rising more than Hulk is used to. 

He snatches the angel out of her hands and cradles her there, away from the spider’s wrath.

"See," she gestures. "And she’s still not broken. And she won’t be, if you don’t let it happen." 

Her voice softens and she gets close to Hulk.

"I know what this means to you….what she means to you. Just be happy, alright. Don’t worry about how dangerous you are, for once. Just love something without fear." 

She looks back at Clint perched on the sofa, who sticks his tongue at her and smiles.

"It can turn out better than you would expect." 

………

He puts the angel on a shelf in his/Banner’s room.

She stays in the box for months. 

Until finally, with trembling hands, he lets her out.

And she remains unbroken.


	19. Poker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b asked you: Hulk goes visiting. Hi-jinks ensue.

Hulk didn't destroy the Baxter tower on purpose.

And it wasn't all his fault.

Grimm was just too much of an asshole, so of course he had to be thrown out a window.

And then the Human Torch decided to butt in,

so he needed to be thrown through a wall…

but friendly like, because Hulk was visiting and visitors are supposed to be friendly.

Thank god the Invisible woman decided that her brother deserved it for being stupid, and decided to go back watching TV.

He really didn't want to hit the pretty lady.

………

Grimm was being stupid by saying that Hulk didn't win that hand of poker.

When he totally did.

So he called Hulk a cheater,

and hence, being thrown out of a window.

……

but this was after the thing with the pizza.

Hulk was hungry, though and Grimm didn't need that last piece, he ate enough already.

And Grimm broke the table

which Hulk hit him with.

So they had to play poker over a washing machine.

………

It wasn't Hulk’s fault that he had to stick Grimm’s face in the thing,

his head needed shining.

………

Which destroyed the washing machine,

but it wasn't like Richards was poor

he could afford another one.

……..

Richards, though, he had to be all “but that’s not the point Hulk.”

and Hulk smashed his smarmy face.

Which just got all stretchy and formed back again.

stupid smarmy Richards.

…..

Richards, who locked Hulk up in his lab

with all that fancy equipment

and the “unbreakable door”

which was broken in seconds.

……..

Eventually the other Avengers got into it and there was a fight all over New York.

Hulk's had worse days.


	20. Tease

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on an original idea.

The great thing about being rich….

well, one of the many great things about being rich,

was being able to have a roof top pool.

Tony was enjoying just that, laying with his eyes half closed on a towel.

Wearing only a gold speedo and a smile. 

Steve was doing laps in the pool, his even strokes trying to lull Tony to sleep.

Suddenly Tony heard/felt the booming steps of one of his teammates coming toward him.

“Hey big guy,” Tony said, not even turning to look at him.

With a thud, Hulk sat down beside him.  Tony finally turned to look at his friend, only to see that Hulk’s eyes were not meeting his. 

No, they were too busy gazing lovingly at his bared chest and toned legs.

One thing he hadn’t learned yet was tact, which Tony approved of. Tact, to him, was overrated.

“Like what you see, Hulk?” Tony purred. 

Hulk turned away so fast that Tony swore he could see particles of air swoosh behind his friend’s head.

“You can look if you want.” Tony said, sitting up. “Do you want to look?”

Hulk’s back straightened and he nodded, still staring into the pool as if it held the secrets of the universe.

“Then look. It’s ok, you know. I like it when you look.”

Hulk slowly turned to stare his friend in the eye.

“I’m gonna ask again,” Tony said, pushing his face inches from Hulk’s, “Do. you. like what you see?”

Hulk breathed softly and whispered, “Yes.”

“You know,” Tony said, whispering in Hulk’s ear, “So do I.”

He heard a splash coming from behind him and heard Steve move closer. Hulk too, got closer to Tony, leaning in to look him right in the eye. 

Tony felt the air becoming charged, see Hulk’s face heating up. Hulk looked down at Tony’s lips and then up to his eyes, trying to take all of his face in.

“What’s going on?” Steve asked from Tony’s side, and yet, it was almost as if Steve was worlds away.

Hulk quickly jumped up and ran toward the pool, ruining Tony’s fun as he splashed in, not so much swimming as waging war on the water.

Tony sighed.

“What’s going on,” He said, “Is that you are, yet again, ruining my fun.”

Tony turned to see Steve’s stern ‘Captain America is judging you’ face pointed right at him.

“What were you doing to him?” Steve asked, pointing toward where Hulk was punching away his frustrations.

Tony stood up to look Steve in the eye. (Well, chin, but it wasn’t his fault that Steve was medically grown to be so damn tall.)

“Hulk and I were having some fun, which you interrupted, Captain Cockblock.”

Steve shook his head. “It looked to me like you were playing one of your games. Hulk isn’t the type of person you play games with. He might take it too seriously.”

“And do what exactly? Try to smash all the water out of my pool? Sounds terrifying.”

Steve was suddenly in his face.

“Maybe he’ll smash half of New York. Maybe you’ll just break his heart. Because he’s not like you, Tony. He doesn’t flirt or tease. He’s the very definition of wearing your heart on your sleeve and whatever games you think he’s playing, whatever fun you think you’re having, Hulk thinks it’s real. And it might break him when he finds out it isn’t.”

Tony grabbed Steve’s  ~~j~~ udgmental finger and pushed it out of his face. “Why can’t teasing and playing games be serious? You ever remember being ‘Little bean pole Stevie?’ Because I bet the kids who weren’t beating the shit out of you, or Bucky, were afraid to touch you. To get into your space and play games, because they were afraid of breaking you. Isn’t that right?”

Steve said nothing.

“Now imagine being Hulk. Having no one in your space, touching you or joking with you or even being a tease. Because, as you’ve said, I do this all the time. With everyone. I wouldn’t even leave skinny Steve out, if I’d known him. No I’d touch and tease, because that’s what I do. Now why should I leave Hulk out of that? Make him feel more secluded from the world, ousted by everyone, unable to feel like one of the team? Because I don’t want to hurt him? Which would hurt him more, huh? Flirting and touching, or walking on egg shells, afraid any little thing I said or did would set him off like a volcano?”

Steve sighed to himself and closed his eyes.

“The very least you could do is explain that to him, alright? For my sake. Just make sure you don’t hurt him in an effort to help him. And for God’s sake, be careful. Not because he’s the Hulk.” Steve said, opening his eyes, “But because he’s a teammate and a friend.”

Then he walked away, his authoritative steps less effective because of the splashing sounds they made. 

After harassing his pool for so long, Hulk climbed out and walked slowly to where Tony was. 

The big man refused to look at Tony directly, instead focusing on his feet, one large hand rubbing at the back of his neck.

“Hulk likes it. The teasing. It’s nice. Don’t stop because of Cap, please?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it darling,” Tony purred. “Now, not that I don’t like you all wet, but how would you feel about me drying you off sweetheart?”

Hulk said yes, but his smile said more than words ever could.


	21. Marked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> original idea

Hickies.

Love bites.

Little purple bruises all over Clint’s body.

Or large brusies,

because they were made from Hulk’s teeth,

and lips.

Clint walks shirtless around Avengers Tower, and the whole team sees.

He smirks at them and Hulk…

Hulk envies him…

People know Hulk left those marks,

know what Hulk does to Clint in their room.

Sees Clint smile and know that he loves it.

Clint is Hulk’s, his entire body is Hulk’s.

Not like an object.

Clint is Clint’s but is also Hulk’s.

And he dares to let everyone see.

Hulk’s own bare chest aches to be covered in marks.

To show that he is loved too.

And he would smile at everyone,

letting them know that he is Clint’s 

just as Clint is his.

Because that is fair.

That is right.

Hulk could touch the marks and remember Clint’s lips…

and teeth.

His penis aches at that thought.

But his skin cannot be marked….

at least, not easily.

So he stares and envies and feels guilty for it all.

……………………

Clint figures out a solution.

Not permanent, because Hulk’s skin defies permanent.

But good enough.

………………………

Hulk walks around the tower,

letting everyone see.

Clint’s lip marks all over his body.

His love marks.

Made by red lipstick, that looks purple on Hulk’s green skin.

Shows where Clint has been.

Hulk belongs now, to Clint.

And everyone knows.

He no longer envies,

just feels loved.

 


	22. Hurt Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An idea of my own. It didn't turn out as well as I had hoped.

He is a monster.

He and Bruce are the monsters and now they finally know. At least they found someone who wants them for the monsters they are.

The only person who is a bigger monster than they are.

 _It’s a way to counteract his feeling of inadequacy_ , Bruce thinks in Hulk’s mind.

 _ **What’s that say about us?**_  Hulk retorts.

……………….

Loki came to them in the rain,  _Because it’s always in the rain_ , Bruce thinks at Hulk again.

He used his magic to go undetected. To find Hulk and Bruce in New York. He went to Bruce first, but it was Hulk he really wanted.

“Hurt me,” He whispered, as Bruce was buying groceries at a vendor’s.

“You know you’d love to.”

“You and the monster both.”

…………………

It didn’t happen all at once.

It only took his leaving the team.

Only took him losing the only family he knew.

Cast aside because he was a freak.

_Because we were mind controlled again._

_Because we destroyed millions._

_Terrified the world._

_….Again._

Worse still, they terrified the team.

Hulk’s insane rushes of anger were too much,

walking on eggshells was too much.

And he knew that his family was afraid.

So he ran

And thought about hurting.

…………………..

Loki approached him again.

And Bruce said no, again.

But Hulk said  ** _yes._**

……………………

Eventually Banner said yes too.

And they became the monsters they were meant to be.


	23. Food

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 51pegasi-b asked you: How Hulk found out what his favorite food is.

Hulk likes lots of foods.

Hot dogs and pizza and macaroni and cheese,

but despite what Banner may say, he doesn’t like everything.

He doesn’t like uncooked shrimp,

or any animal where the eyes are still there.

Or cheesecake (which makes him kinda sad, because he loves almost every kind of cake).

But his favorite food is sushi, with lots of wasabi.

And he didn’t know this until the Avengers made him try it.

In an effort to broaden their horizons (which probably meant Thor and Steve’s horizons, because they were usually who the whole “broadening horizons” stuff was about) the team had sushi for dinner one night.

Steve stared at it with concern but ended up loving it.

Thor wolfed it down before declaring it “sub-par”

And Hulk….

Hulk was a mix of both.

He scarfed some down and…it was weird.

Not instant love, like with hot dogs and hamburgers and chips (and beans and tacos and a bunch of others)

but it was interesting, something he didn’t expect.

So he tried some more, with some wasabi

and ginger

and his mouth still didn’t know what to make of it. 

Not until the next day, when his stomach was yelling at him to eat, dear god, eat

and the rest of him could only think about last nights leftovers, his mouth salivating while pictures of sushi danced in his mind,

that he realized he loved sushi most of all.


	24. Sexual Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a sequel to chapter 16

This was the most surreal thing Tony Stark had ever done.

Which was saying a lot. 

He sat across from Clint in one chair and Hulk in the other. Clint stealing worried glances at his lover and Hulk looking ashamed.

He tapped at his tablet and cleared his throat.

“Ripping off clothes, yes or no?”

“Yes,” Clint said with a smile, followed by a nod from the Hulk.

“Bite marks.”

“Yes.” Clint responded adamantly. Hulk agreed.

“Possessive language?”

Hulk tilted his head.

“My pet, my slut, that kinda thing.”

“Oh, yes.....if Clint says yes.”

“You know that’s not how this works, you both gotta say what’s true for you.”

Clint turned and placed a hand on Hulk’s bicep. “Don’t give the answer you think I want. Do what you want, it’s the only way for this to work. I have to know what you like too.”

Hulk shrugged. “Ok.”

Clint had cornered Tony a week ago, apparently after a rather bad experience with Hulk, which made Tony shudder to contemplate. Apparently they had things to work out, sexual kink wise, and Clint saw Tony as some sort of expert.

Which he was, true enough.

“Bondage?”

“Yes.” “No.” Hulk looked down at his hands.

“No one should be trapped, not ever.”

“ I didn’t know you felt so strongly about that Hulk. Ok, we don’t have to do that if you don’t want.” Clint said.

“What about what Clint wants?”

“He just wants you to be happy I’m sure.” Tony said, making sure to put ‘bondage’ in Hulk’s “never ever” column. A column that already included “mean names, like whore or freak, though not slut if it was used nicely, like ‘good slut’” and “no hitting, kicking or slapping.” 

“Hulk wants Clint to be happy. This whole thing is stupid.” Hulk jumped out of the chair in frustration. 

“What’s stupid about finding out what you like?”

“It’s pointless. Hulk likes what Clint likes. No reason to protect Hulk.”

Clint stood up too. “There’s every reason to protect Hulk. I love you and I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Hulk got in his lover’s face.

“You can’t hurt Hulk. Not ever. Hulk can hurt. Hulk did hurt. Hulk could rip you apart. You can’t do that to Hulk.”

“Well what about last time?”

“Last time.”

“Yeah, when you fucked me and cried? You sayin’ you weren’t hurt?”

Tony wisely let them talk uninterrupted, though he took notes.

“Hulk wasn’t the one walking funny after. Hulk wasn’t covered in marks.”

“Just because I can’t cut you or give you physical pain doesn’t mean I can’t hurt you. Something we did, something I asked you to do, pushed you too far and upset you. Not physically, but emotionally. That stuff matters just as much. If not to you, then to me. Because I love you, alright.

Clint stepped closer and attempted to wrap his arms around Hulk’s waist.

“I love you and I’m sorry. What wen’t wrong last time Hulk? What do we need to do differently?”

“Nothing, Hulk will do what Clint wants.”

“What do you want? Please, tell me.”

“Hulk....” He cleared his throat. “Hulk wants....Clint happy.”

“Hulk....”

“Happy and not in pain. Happy and not thrown around like a doll. Happy and not bruised and scared. Hulk took and took what he wanted and gave Clint pain. Can’t do that. Can’t hurt Clint ever again. Taking and hurting like some...some  _monster_.” Hulk’s voice tapered out and he began to shake.

“But you did it....because that’s what I wanted. Without caring about how much it hurt you.”

“Can’t hurt Hulk. Don’t need to protect Hulk.”

“But he did hurt you. Because you wouldn’t tell him what you needed, you engaged in a behavior that made you feel like, in your words, a monster. Didn’t that hurt? In your heart, didn’t that hurt?” Tony finally spoke.

Hulk shook his head.

“Hulk yes, Don’t let me talk you into something you don’t want. That’s hurtful too. Can’t you see it?” Clint let Hulk go and paced.

“You have the biggest fucking heart of anyone I’ve ever known I’ve broken it, by rushing into something you weren’t ready for. I hurt you Hulk. Say it. Tell me you were hurt. Let me know so we won’t do it again.”

Hulk’s eyes started to water.

“Hulk hurt....Hurting Clint hurts Hulk. Hulk didn’t get to be gentle, give kisses or... love on Clint. There was no love it....Hulk had to growl and take and be the monster and Hulk doesn’t want to be a monster he....” He was crying in earnest now, hands in front of his face.

“Then we just don’t do that anymore, ok?”

“But if Hulk can’t be the monster for Clint....If Hulk....Clint....Clint won’t want Hulk anymore.”

Clint gasped. He moved toward his lover again. “You seriously believe that. You think, because you refuse to fuck me a certain way that that’s it.”

“Hulk is a monster....and Clint wants a monster.” Hulk wiped his eyes.

“Wrong on both counts. Clint doesn’t want a monster and You sure as shit aren’t one. I just like it a little rough sometimes, doesn’t mean I’m gonna leave if that’s something you can’t give. Would I have arranged this in the first place if that were true? I want what you’re willing to give. And if that isn’t a little rough and tumble, well I’m fine with it. You don’t need to do that to make me stay.”

“You just need to be you, that’s all I ever wanted.”

Hulk sniffed again and turned away. “Truth?”

“100%”

Tony edged out of the room, fearing that he had already witnessed too much of an intimate moment. But he did see the lover’s embrace on his way out. 

He let out a sigh of relief.

“Looks like those two kooky kids are gonna make it.” He said to himself.


	25. Lessons from Bad Men

Hulk has learned a lot from bad men.

At his birth, years before he actually had a body, he learned from the bad man.

He learned that he didn’t want to hurt what was his.

that you protect what’s yours.

He learned that yelling and punching are not love,

and not to do them to those you love.

He learned that anger and envy can lead to very bad things.

Most of all, he learned that being like the bad man lead to people you love crushed under you, bleeding.

From Ross he learned more about love.

You can protect what you love too much.

Shelter it,

imprison it.

People and love want to be free.

So the people you love should be doubly so.

If you protect what you love too much it will resent you and find a way out, 

a way far away from you.

From Loki he learned not to forget love.

Not to let your anger and hurt over other things cloud your love.

Or to let those you love be thrown aside in your strive to get even with life for disappointing you.

For the people who loved you should be remembered and protected,

but not hidden from the world. 

You should show them off to the world,

how wonderful they are and how beautiful their love is. 


	26. She makes me feel normal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blackatdp requested: Hulk/Wasp "She makes me feel normal"

They cuddle while watching tv together.

The team takes pictures and coo over them because they think it’s funny to see Hulk blush.

................................

He rubs her back during team meetings because it’s soothing for him and for her.

She leans into his touch.

........................

They kiss at the movies

She licks popcorn butter off his lips

.........................

He meets her parents

They are....overwhelmed

She says they’ll love him in time

............................

He takes her to meet his mother

and then he wakes up

and they visit her grave

She brings flowers

And holds him while he cries

............................

They fight off Gods, Monsters, Evil Mutants and Moleman

She hugs him with her body sweaty from the fight.

.........................

They make love in their room

He holds her close and she mumbles in contentment.

........................

She shows him the test a month later.

He’s gonna be a daddy.

........................

And for a minute, while they cry

and hug

and think about how to tell the team

he feels normal

scared out of his mind,

but normal.


	27. The Avengers (minus Natasha) go to a strip club

Clint and Tony came up with the idea.

Which made it doomed from the start.

Tony did call the club to give them a heads up, which was surprisingly thoughtful of him, Steve thought.

With Clint, Tony and Hulk involved, it wasn’t like Thor to sit at home. And because Clint, Tony, Hulk and Thor having a night on the town seemed like a recipe for disaster, Steve found himself coming along too.

“Tell me how much of the city gets destroyed.” Natasha called before they left.

When they entered the place, Steve was surprised at how empty it seemed. True to his somewhat exaggerated reputation, he had never been in a strip club before. Not because he objected to them as a concept, he could understand what some people got out of them but the idea just didn’t...appeal for some reason.

Seeing strangers he had no feelings for grinding against polls, patrons and each other just did nothing for him.

Tony forced them to the front of the stage.

“Right in the middle of the action.” He said with a smirk. Clint looked over and snickered at Hulk, who was at Steve’s side and blushing slightly.

The Hulk hadn’t said anything as they walked over, only walked around looking a bit lost.

Tony, Clint and Thor sat down in anticipation, looking nothing short of hungry, while Hulk and Steve huddled at the end of the line. Steve looked at Hulk and saw his own emotions on the giant’s face.

He started to believe that Hulk wasn’t going to react the way Tony and Clint wanted him to.

Music started and the lights lowered. The DJ said...something about the stripper getting ready to perform for them. 

Tony ordered something expensive, Clint ordered some off-brand beer and Thor ordered a rum and coke,  just because of the taste.

Steve just ordered water, smirking at the idea of fitting into his whole “Captain America” stereotype.

From the speakers came the phrase “Preach out and touch faith”

Then the stripper came sauntering in, wearing a three piece double breasted suit, including a fedora covering her eyes.

Her bright red hair hung down to her back. He could tell she was on the skinnier side, but most of her body was hidden.

Everyone turned to look at her, because she was the main attraction. Tony elbowed Hulk to get him to pay attention.

“This one’s for you big guy,” Clint whispered in his ear.

“Huh?” Hulk asked, confused.

“Your own, personal Jesus.”

“Someone to hear your prayer, someone who cares.”

The woman’s (Cherry Bomb’s) hat went flying as she approached the poll. She slowly stripped down to her underwear, doing some acrobatics on the poll. 

She was beautiful, but Steve felt nothing.

As he suspected she was on the skinny side, with little perky breasts and a large tattoo of a bird escaping a cage on her ribs.

“Reach out and touch faith.”

She was on her hands and knees, slithering toward them. 

Tony whispered something in her ear and she was stock still for a moment, her eyes looking fearfully over toward Hulk.

Then she swayed toward him.

“Hey sweetness, your friends want me to give you a little dance, would you like that?” she purred.

“Come on Hulk!” Clint screamed at him.

Thor clapped his back and Tony looked at him expectantly.

Hulk nodded grimly.

Cherry Bomb got on her knees and then lept from the stage to Hulk’s lap. She couldn’t wrap her legs around his waist and settled for straddling a thigh instead.

She writhed on his thigh, running her hands through her hair and across her breasts.

Hulk looked at her in shock, his hands fisted at his sides.

“Spread your legs a little, honey.” She said.

Hulk complied and she turned around, rubbing her ass against his crotch.

“Do you like it sweetie? Do you like this?”

Hulk mumbled something and turned to look at Steve. There was a red color to his face that Steve was shocked to see.

He’s...He’s blushing. 

Cherry moved again, back to straddling a thigh, she encouraged Hulk to move his face forward and pushed him into her breasts, Clint and Tony howling as she did so.

She trusted into his face, moving her hips against him and tossing her hair.

“Mmm, sweetie, so gentle. Gotta say I’m pleasantly surprised.”

Clint elbowed him in the side. “This is where you pay her.”

Hulk moved his face away from her breasts and dug into his pants.

“Wait a minute, Hulk has money?” Steve asked.

“Hulk doesn’t have money....” He said and then smiled, “But Banner does.” And he grabbed some bills in his big fists and shoved them in the stripper’s general direction.

“You’re supposed to put it right...here.” Cherry said, grabbing Hulk’s hand and guiding it toward the strap of her thong. His hands brushed her hip as he put the money in.

She continued to move, Tony, Clint and Thor cheering them both on. 

Her movements became erratic and she looked around a bit confused...and then concerned. 

“Hey sweetie, you like this?” She asked, slowing her thrusts.

Hulk shrugged, looking away from her.

“I don’t think he’s enjoying himself,” Cherry said, slowing to a stop.

Tony gave her some large bills. “Maybe he just needs a little longer.”

“I don’t think that’s it Tony,” Steve spoke up.

“Of course he does! Who doesn’t like strip clubs?”

“I don’t.”

“Well that’s just because you’re....you. I’m sure Hulk’s having a great time.”

Tony leaned over to talk to Hulk.

“You enjoy this, right?”

Hulk looked long and hard into Tony’s too bright eyes and shrugged.

“Hulk likes the girl, she’s pretty. Likes music. Likes being with the team. Isn’t that the point?”

“The point,” Clint spoke up, “is having a sexy woman taking her clothes off for you, letting you see everything up close and personal, dancing on top of you like she wants you. That’s the point.”

Hulk turned toward Cherry. “You’re pretty. Hulk likes you, just...not the dancing. Hulk doesn’t understand but....it doesn’t feel right.”

The stripper got off his body, picking up bills as she did so and she skipped off to another adoring fan who was more than happy to have her special attention.

“Well I, for one, am shocked. You truly do not understand the joys of life.” Tony smirked, but said nothing else.

“You do know we made this trip for your benefit.” Thor chimed in, “If we knew your objections....”

“Hulk didn’t know he had objections...” He replied.

“What didn’t you like big guy?” Clint asked.

“She was a stranger. Someone Hulk didn’t know pretending to want him for money. It felt....fake. Hulk doesn’t like fake.”

“Well yeah, but everything about strippers is fake, thought you knew that Hulk.” Tony commented again.

“Hulk hates fake. Hulk would like sexy dancing if it meant anything. Sweet words if they were true. But it was just so the lady could get paid. It meant nothing it....Hulk wants that sort of thing to mean something.”

Steve was taken aback at hearing his own sentiments come out of Hulk’s mouth. They were simple, true, but conveying much more than even Hulk understood.

He saw that Hulk was concerned and frustrated, not quite getting what made him different from the others.

Or that it was ok to be different.

“It’s ok Hulk,” He responded, patting Hulk’s thigh. “I’m not a big fan of this stuff either.”

“You’re not?” He asked.

“Nope, big fella. I understand why others like it, I just only want to be touched by people who I love, otherwise it almost makes my skin crawl. I suspect you’re much the same. It’s perfectly fine, you know. Sure it might make you different, especially in a team full of perverts.” He said jokingly, “But it’s nothing wrong with you.”

Hulk turned toward Steve with a new found interest. “You feel the skin crawling thing too?”

Steve nodded.

“Do you like sexy pictures and movies?”

Steve shook his head.

“Do they feel wrong to you, like you shouldn’t be watching them?”

“Because they’re people doing a job instead of loving each other?” Steve responded.

Hulk’s lips broke out in a big grin.

“Yes! All of that! You feel that too?”

“Yes, I’ve always felt that way.”

“Hulk too! You’re like Hulk? Feel the same way as Hulk?”

“I always have buddy.” Steve felt a line connecting them as they never had been before.

They smiled at each other only to hear Tony say, “Good deal, more strippers for the rest of us.”

Steve and Hulk left the team to it, deciding to walk back to the tower together and discuss their new-found connection.


	28. Intimidation

Hulk liked to squat down when talking to kids, so he would seem less intimidating.

He talked quietly when he talked at all, to calm the other person down in his presence.

He touched gently, whenever he touched, just to prove that he could.

He held his friends softly, so as not to make them fear being held by him.

And when he was with a lover, he never threw them down, ripped off clothing, and he hated being on top.

He did not want to be towering over the vulnerable body of someone he loved.

Making them feel trapped by his muscular body,

knowing they could not escape.

He much preferred having his lover on top, knowing they were in control,

knowing they were safe.

And that was the biggest part of it, though he did not know himself.

He was protecting those around him from himself.

From the fear of the bad man who could crush them if he wished.

The bad man he always remembered

as towering above him, shouting and pushing and hurting. 


End file.
